Am I growing up?

Then

I loved chocolates.I used to crave for dairy milk ,my favourite chocolate in the whole world.I would not compramise for anything less than a chocolate.

Now

It's been nearly 2 years since I had a chocolate..don't crave for them.I can buy lots of them now without having to get permissions yet they are the least priority I give.

Then

I had lots of interest in dresses and used to shop for them very now and them.I used to take keen interest in the models and used to make sure I get my chudidars stitched with the latest models, with the best tailors.I never let anyone shop for me.

Now

Though I am choosy with clothing,I have definitely grown out of being fussy.I left the choice to my sis and mom/mil this India trip.I give preference to K's choices than mine.

Then

I had lots of friends..very close ones.I used to share my joys and griefs with them. We used to have lot of girlie time together and always had a shoulder to lean on.I was always busy with friends and phone calls.

Now

I don't have any close ones.I hang out just for fun and share some good time together.I miss all my wonderful friends in India.I don't feel connected as I had felt in India with friends.

Then

Although I loved my parents a lot..I never took an initiative to express my love to them.Infact I never understood the value of their love and their affection.There had been times when I felt they didn't love me as they did my younger sis.

Now

I completely understand their love towards me and their successful trials in bringing me up.I am what they made out of me and proud to be their daughter.I take every opportunity to express love and completely agree that there is no love greater than parents' love.

Then

I used to fight with my sis and not speak for hours with her.I used to frown at her when she used my nail polish or my lipstick.

Now

I realise how much I miss my sister and cry when she says she misses me and wants me back there.I wish time just gets rewinded and I could share all my things with her and compensate for what I did then.I managed to take home everything for her this trip yet..I hate myself for how mean I was then.

Then

I thought I was ok at english.I thought I can write few sentences better than some.

Now

I know I suck at the language.I am so bad at expressing my feelings and this blog is an example of that.

Then

Life was so simple..just the thought of exams used to make me stressed and exam time was the toughest time I underwent.

Now

Life is not so simple as it was.There had been many exams life has been throwing at me since then.But I am trying to take everything as a passing cloud am learning from every mistake I make.

Then

I believed God and trusted him in everything.I prayed to him in every step I took.I asked him to be with me in everything I did.

Now

I believe God and trust him .I strongly believe it is He who connected me to Kiran.I feel fortunate to have Kiran in my life.I never forget to thank God for being kind to me and giving me the joy of life.

God,Please guide me in every step and be with me in every breath.